Maybe the reason i dont write is because im scared of the power of my words. with small squiggles on blank paper i can evoke a myriad of experiences for you, a stranger. I can provoke anger, smoldering at your solar plexus with depictions of cruelty and malice. I can melt your heartspace with tales of what beings have given others in the name of love. With a few thoughtfully placed lines I can draw tears from your eyes for a person that doesnt exist outside of our minds. I can even excite your biology, seducing you with sensuous syllables bringing you into the most private encounters. I can make you stay up late hiding under the covers with a flashlight, or make you feel a pocket of emptiness when you turn the last page. But I dont write. Maybe I am scared of the power woven into these words and don't feel i have the right to jump into your intangible imagination. So I let the letters dance pirorouettes around my mind, phrases floating by my ears and poetry alighting on my skin. I brush it off, not feeling ready to turn my thoughts into visible magic. maybe im afraid that if i finally open the gates the torrent wont ever stop. maybe im afraid that people will find my words trite cliche and bland. maybe im afraid that readers will be intrigued and chase me down for more words becoming dependent on the wisdom. maybe im afraid that no one will read it anyway but maybe thats actually what is prefer, maybe im scared that i wont ever get known or that strangers will see my naked self, way scarier than showing just my body, after all i had nothing to do with making that.but my words, those come from my soul.
but don't worry-I will keep writing!!!
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